This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
