i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
