i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Randomize
