one word: firstdatebathroomanal
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
