did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize