he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
