I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
