she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
