Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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