do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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