Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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