So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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