I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
