You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
