idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I just blew my weed a kiss
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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