i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize