It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
