Yo dont text me then not text me
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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