FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Of course I have a pirate flag
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
