new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
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