just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
You are a genius and a whore.
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