is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
