All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
