I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
