you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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