Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
