I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
