Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
