you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
