Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
