While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
