Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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