Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Send help, water and tortillas.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Randomize
