So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
