You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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