i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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