Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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