Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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