Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
i believe in u and ur pee
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
