I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
