Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Randomize
