i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
