You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
