So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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