either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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