Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize