We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
