Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
