i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
