ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
