I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize