It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
When are your genitals available?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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